Attitude Towards Grades

Last night I climbed with a friend in a gym. She used to be able to clean 5.11, but was now struggling with a 5.9. Everytime she told me about a move where she came off the wall wasn't really a difficult move, I felt that she was perhaps trying to remind me that she was in the calibre of 5.11. I asked that if she was sensitive or conscious about how others perceive her climbing ability. She replied, "....yes."

"Me too," I said. I remembered feeling slightly uncomfortable when a climbing friend who used to second my trad lead and struggled at 5.7 one day top roped a 5.10c where I failed. "The truth is: I feel good about myself when I climb better than others," I said, "In order to not feel bad about myself when I'm not climbing better than others, I first need to not to feel particularly good about myself simply because I can climb a higher grade than others."

"Yes," she said, "If you're a good climber, it doesn't mean you're a good person. -- This is what they taught us in the outdoor climbing course I took earlier this year. And, there's a saying: the best climbers are those who have the most fun!"

Our climbing seemed to be more focused on fun from then on.